How Wifi Wifie got her name and other stories

I was asked in a comment on a previous post (Quit-line original) why I call Tessa "WIFI Wifie" on and the answer is "I don't", except on Quit-line. I'm already using my real given name and the first letter of my surname. If I used her given name as well we'd be easily identifiable. Obviously this is now published on my public blog but at least initially I was not wanting to unambiguously identify myself. Especially as the image I displayed on my Quit line profile really is me from a couple of years back. My hair is longer now.

I do like her and as they all sound too curt, I didn't want to just say something purely descriptive like "The wife", "My former fiancée" or "She who must be appeased with the hearts of young children"

"Wifie" was simply intended as an affectionate diminutive for "wife". I'll admit that I didn't do my homework properly there as that's an Americanism. The term doesn't exist as such in standard English but in Geordie it's derogatory (ref: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/wifie).
Again it was a bit curt and even without the research seemed almost a put-down "widdle iddle wifie", so I wanted a little something extra.

Eventually by an in-depth process of looking up slightly to the right of my computerat a small plastic box with aerials and flashing lights I came up with WIFI. That's too prosaic, so I needed a better justification.

"WIFI" because:

1. If you search Google for Wifie, it will suggest "wifi"
2. It's nicely alliterative.
3. We each have Android phones and tablets and share an iPad we won. I like my keyboard and desktop, she prefers using the tablets via WIFI

An earlier version of this posting was originally published on Quit line on Sunday 28 September 2014.