I had another rough day, exhaustion and needed to sleep for much of the
day. I'm really looking forward to this symptom of whatever going away.
Today is Tessa's birthday and we went out for dinner at Tony's Henderson
(Her choice). She asked me a couple of times if I wanted to go for a
cigarette, I just said "No". After the main she asked again and this
time I just looked at her.
Tessa: "Why are you looking at me like that?"
Me: continued looking
T: "Have you given up or something?"
T: looks in disbelief "When?"
Me: "4 weeks ago"
Me: "I don't want to die"
T: "Why didn't you tell me?"
Me: For the first couple of days I didn't want any additional stress.
Since then I've been waiting for you to realise.
It's a relief that it's finally out of the bag as I'd been getting
rather bored of the "say nothing" game.
It's a relief finally being out of the closet with respect to my
An earlier version of this posting was originally published on Quit line on Thursday 2 October 2014.